Cooked Cabbage

Today my kids helped me make lunch. They helped by chopping cabbage, crunching up ramen noodles and toasting up some almonds. Yes, the famous cabbage salad that is available in mass quantaties at church pot luck dinners- is also served at least once a week in my home as part of a meal. While chopping the cabbage with a dull butterknife,(it's all I will let my accident prone, ninja wanna be boy use while I am in his blood zone-) my son commented on how he loves the smell of raw cabbage, but hates the smell of it when it's cooked. At his remark, an instant smile spread accross my face and I remembered a time when he was just a newborn baby being rocked in my arms when I shared those same feelings about cooked cabbage. It all started with a breast infection called mastitis, which causes severe pain and high fevers. My newborn was just a few days old when the infection hit. I was also recovering from a c-section, and suffering from all that comes from extreme sleep depravation. My mother, knowing how bad my post partum depression gets when I don't get any sleep, came to my rescue early one morning by announcing she was taking the older kids to school,as well as picking them up from school, and then taking the baby and my toddler for the whole day. She gave me strict orders that I was to stay in bed all day and sleep. She also told me that she had heard that wrapping your breasts in cold cabbage leaves helps to ease the pain while recovering from mastitis. My Lortab 5's did nothing for my pain,and only made me sleepy, so I quit taking them after the first night home from the hospital. I was desparate for some relief and told her I would be willing to try anything at this point. She promptly went to the grocery store and bought the biggest head of cabbage available. We decided to peel apart the massive leaves and freeze them individually before using them. She then packed up the stuff she would need to care for my children at her house all day, loaded up the kids, and left. I waited about 30 minutes before checking to see if my cabbage leaves were ready. They were frozen stiff, so I took a few of them and strategically placed them one by one, layer by layer, all around my boobs until I felt like an enormous human egg roll. I then took another dose of antibiotics along with some pain pills and got myself situated in my bed. The last thing I thought before falling asleep was how ridiculous I felt having my bra packed full of cabbage. I woke up several hours later to the sound of my children rushing in through the front door. What?!! Is this for real?!! Did I seriously just sleep the ENTIRE day?! I looked at the clock. NO WAY! It was past 5:00pm! I felt great! I felt alive again! I made my way out of my bed to greet my mother and children out in the living room. She left after knowing for certain that my husband would soon be home from work, and since the children had already been fed dinner, I let them just sit and watch a movie while I snuggled with my baby in the rocking chair. I was enjoying having my baby in my arms, but he stunk! I checked his diaper...clean. I asked the kids who were all near by if someone just tooted or something. Nope. I looked around my surroundings for a dirty diaper, or something. Nothing. Wait a minute...*sniff*, *sniff*, what is that? *sniff* *sniff*, what the heck is that smell? It smelt good and horrible at the same time. I looked over towards the kitchen. Had my mom brought dinner? Was there some kind of stew in the crock pot? *sniff*... *sniff*...What the heck! It totally smells like something is cooking, something like....CABBAGE!!!!! Oh my gosh! I quickly set the baby down, and checked down my shirt. I reached down my bra. UHG! Soggy, wilted, smelly, cooked cabbage! Ha Ha. I thought how funny it would have beeen if my husband would have walked in from work just then. "Hi Honey, I'm home! *sniff* mmmmmmm! Something smells really good! What's for dinner?!!"